A few days after, the report went abroad that we were to be tried. Also my father returned from the city spent with weariness; and he came up to me to cast down my faith saying: Have pity, daughter, on my gray hairs; have pity on your father, if I am worthy to be, called father by you; if with these hands I have brought you unto this flower of youth and I have preferred you before all your brothers; give me not over to the reproach of men. Look upon your brothers; look upon your mother and mother’s sister; look upon your son, who will not endure to live after you. Give up your resolution; do not destroy us all together; for none of us will speak openly against men again if you suffer aught.

This he said fatherly in his love, kissing my hands and grovelling at my feet; and with tears he named me, not daughter, but lady. And I was grieved for my father’s case because he would not rejoice at my passion out of all my kin; and I comforted him, saying: That shall be done at this tribunal, whatsoever God shall please; for know that we are not established in our own power, but in God’s. And he went from me very sorrowful.

Another day as we were at meal we were suddenly snatched away to be tried; and we came to the forum. Therewith a report spread abroad through the parts near to the forum, and a very great multitude gathered together. We went up to the tribunal. The others being asked, confessed. So they came to me. And my father appeared there also, with my son, and would draw me from the step, saying: Perform the Sacrifice; have mercy on the child. And Hilarian the procurator – he that after the death of Minucius Timinian the proconsul had received in his room the right and power of the sword – said: Spare your father’s gray hairs; spare the infancy of the boy. Make sacrifice for the Emperors’ prosperity. And I answered: I am a Christian. And when my father stood by me yet to cast down my faith, he was bidden by Hilarian to be cast down and was smitten with a rod. And I sorrowed for my father’s harm as though I had been smitten myself; so sorrowed I for his unhappy old age. Then Hilarian passed sentence upon us all and condemned us to the beasts; and cheerfully we went down to the dungeon. Then because my child had been used to being breastfed and to staying with me in the prison, straightway I sent Pomponius the deacon to my father, asking for the child. But my father would not give him. And as God willed, no longer did he need to be suckled, nor did I take fever; that I might not be tormented by care for the child and by the pain of my breasts. — Perpetua’s account para. 5-6.

Then said my brother to me: Lady my sister, you are now in high honor, even such that you might ask for a vision; and it should be shown you whether this be a passion or else a deliverance. And I, as knowing that I conversed with the Lord, for Whose sake I had suffered such things, did promise him nothing doubting; and I said: Tomorrow I will tell you. And I asked, and this was shown me.

I beheld a ladder of bronze, marvelously great, reaching up to heaven; and it was narrow, so that not more than one might go up at one time. And in the sides of the ladder were planted all manner of things of iron. There were swords there, spears, hooks, and knives; so that if any that went up took not good heed or looked not upward, he would be torn and his flesh cling to the iron. And there was right at the ladder’s foot a serpent lying, marvelously great, which lay in wait for those that would go up, and frightened them that they might not go up. Now Saturus went up first (who afterwards had of his own free will given up himself for our sakes, because it was he who had edified us; and when we were taken he had not been there). And he came to the ladder’s head; and he turned and said: Perpetua, I await you; but see that serpent bite you not. And I said: it shall not hurt me, in the name of Jesus Christ. And from beneath the ladder, as though it feared me, it softly put forth its head; and as though I trod on the first step I trod on its head. And I went up, and I saw a very great space of garden, and in the midst a man sitting, white-headed, in shepherd’s clothing, tall milking his sheep; and standing around in white were many thousands. And he raised his head and beheld me and said to me: Welcome, child. And he cried to me, and from the curd he had from the milk he gave me as it were a morsel; and I took it with joined hands and ate it up; and all that stood around said, Amen. And at the sound of that word I awoke, yet eating I know not what of sweet.

And at once I told my brother, and we knew it should be a passion; and we began to have no hope any longer in this world. — Perpetua’s account para. 4.

There were apprehended the young catechumens, Revocatus and Felicity his fellow servant, Saturninus and Secundulus. With them also was Vibia Perpetua, nobly born reared in a liberal manner, wedded honorably; having a father and mother and two brothers, one of them a catechumen likewise, and a son, a child at the breast; and she herself was about twenty-two years of age. What follows here shall she tell herself; the whole order of her martyrdom as she left it written with her own hand and in her own words.

When, she said, we were still under legal surveillance and my father was liked to vex me with his words and continually strove to hurt my faith because of his love: Father, said I, Do you see (for examples) this vessel lying, a pitcher or whatsoever it may be? And he said, I see it. And I said to him, Can it be called by any other name than that which it is? And he answered, No. So can I call myself nought other than that which I am, a Christian.

Then my father angry with this word came upon me to tear out my eyes; but he only vexed me, and he departed vanquished, he and the arguments of the devil. Then because I was without my father for a few days I gave thanks unto the Lord; and I was comforted because of his absence. In this same space of a few days we were baptised, and the Spirit declared to me, I must pray for nothing else after that water save only endurance of the flesh. After a few days we were taken into prison, and I was much afraid because I had never known such darkness. O bitter day! There was a great heat because of the press, there was cruel handling of the soldiers. Lastly I was tormented there by care for the child.

Then Tertius and Pomponius, the blessed deacons who ministered to us, obtained with money that for a few hours we should be taken forth to a better part of the prison and be refreshed. Then all of them going out from the dungeon took their pleasure; I suckled my child that was now faint with hunger. And being careful for him, I spoke to my mother and strengthened my brother and commended my son unto them. I pined because I saw they pined for my sake. Such cares I suffered for many days; and I obtained that the child should abide with me in prison; and straightway I became well and was lightened of my labour and care for the child; and suddenly the prison was made a palace for me, so that I would sooner be there than anywhere else. — Prologue para. 2 through Perpetua’s account para. 3.

Who ever saw a bridegroom sacrificed at the marriage supper, or brides eating their betrothed? The Son of God has done a new thing in the world, which no man ever did but He alone. His Body and His Blood He has set forth at the feast before them that sit at table, that they may eat of Him, and live with Him without end. Meat and drink is our Lord at His marriage supper: blessed is He who has given us His Body and Blood, that in Him we may delight.

When the Body of the Son of God is set upon His table, bring in before Him all thy petitions earnestly. Reveal thy plagues, O thou sick soul, and show thy diseases, and pour out tears before the table of the Godhead. In that hour when the priest sacrifices the Son before His Father, gird thyself, enter, O soul, and ask for pardon with a loud voice. Say to the Father, “Behold Thy Son, a sacrifice to reconcile Thee: pardon me in Him who died for me and was buried. Behold Thine Oblation: accept from my hands Him who is from Thee.”

With these affections stand, O sinner, at the time of the Mysteries; and beg mercy and receive forgiveness, and then go forth. At the hour of the sacrifice, when it is being offered for thee, do not leave him who is offering and depart. When they drive out “him who has not received the sign,” do thou enter; keep thyself within and hearken to the whisperings of the priest, and hear how he begs mercy for sinners and pardons them; and if thou art in need of pardon, why then dost thou go out? Another bows down and asks mercy for thee; why art thou in haste to wander among the markets in that hour? When those who have not received the sign of the Bridegroom enter her, the Church drives them out and shuts the doors until He comes. She fears lest He should find in her a stranger when He appears in her, and she removes and expels all externs. The bride shuts the doors and eats the Bridegroom who has espoused her; and no stranger may taste of Him, for (this) she does not permit to him.

But (perchance) thou sayest: “I will go and be about business until the consecration (is begun), and in the hour when they open the doors I will go in and receive.” O thou who art wise, drive away and put forth these notions from thee, and suffer thy soul to have a care for her wounds and bind them up. Say to thy soul: ” O thou soul, full of sores, now is the time for thee to receive a medicine for thy wounds. Now is the time for thee to pour out tears before Him who binds up, and He will apply mercy to thy disease which vexes thee. Now is the time when the door of the Great Physician is opened, and He will bind up for naught; bring in thy sore that He may find a remedy for it. Now is the hour for thee to lift up thy voice in supplication; for now the gates on high are opened to prayers. Now is the hour when thou mayest entreat thy Creditor to come forth and cancel the note of hand that is terrifying thee. Now is the hour when the Son of God is sacrificed and set forth upon the table for sinners, to pardon them. Now is the hour when the doors and curtains give way, that the sacrifice may come in and mercy go forth for sinners. Whither, whither wouldst thou go forth, O soul, in this hour when every man enters to gather mercy from the Merciful. O thou soul, the ewe that fell among robbers, be quiet in the fold, full of healing for the broken. Without the door the wolf is hiding and waiting for thee; anoint thy lips with the Blood of the Shepherd, and then go forth and despise him. For the Bridegroom has come down and given thee His Body and sealed thee with His Blood: never shouldst thou go forth from the bride-chamber to them that are without. The way of the world is full of snares and obstacles; the devils are standing on guard at the cross-roads of the earth; and they threaten the soul with rage to destroy it, and they thirst for her blood because of the virtues which are held within her. And with all manner of pretexts and devices they lay snares for her to corrupt her from that virtue which belongs to her. But thou, O soul, hast an armour and a wall, yea, and a Saviour who will not fail thee in the contest. He keeps thee from the pitfalls of the enemy; and he will shew thee a way of life to walk therein. He brings thee in before His Father, that thou mayest see His place; and He shews thee that He is a sacrifice on behalf of sinners. Make thy petition in the name of the Son: offer it to His Father; and He will receive it for the sake of the sign of His Only-begotten.

The Bridegroom is coming down to see the bride betrothed to Him; abide, O soul, in the midst of the bride-chamber, that He may see thee here. Go not forth from the chamber of the Bridegroom, the King, who is coming down to see thee, bearing riches from the house of His Father. The priest, whom thou hast sent, has called Him: wait for Him; for if He come and see thee not, He will be angry. Together with the priest the whole people beseeches the Father that He will send His Son, that he may come down (and dwell upon the oblation. And the Holy Spirit, His Power, lights down in the bread and wine, and sanctifies (or “consecrates”) it, yea, makes it the Body and the Blood. And every one who is in the house bestirs himself, that he may cry,”Our Father”; and the new sons sanctify and bless Him. And by His brooding He mingles them holily, and they become one with Him, as it is written, mystically. But he who goes forth with the hearers, what will he do when they petition Him in in the house, and he is not (there) to cry, “Our Father.” He has cut Himself off; none (else) has cut him off from the brooding. What then has he found in the market-places whither he is roaming? Despise business, and despise profits which cannot be held fast, and at the hour of the Mysteries abide in the house of God. Your enemy is watching, and is athirst for your blood, and so far as he is able he will cut you off from things profitable. When these Mysteries full of life are administered, he fabricates apprehensions of all sorts of losses, and with all manner of devices he, by his subtlety, drives thee forth, that thou mayest be removed from that congregation which is crying “Holy.”

Satan is distressed by these voices of holiness; and if he could he would drive the whole world forth.. There would not remain one man in the holy place to cry, “Our Father.” … In that hour when the bride cries out, “Forgive me my debts” he knows that the Bridegroom, the King, is full of mercy, and that He hears her (the bride), and He forgives her who died for her. Wherefore Satan is concerned and uses much pains to drive men out of the holy place at the time of the Mysteries, lest when the whole congregation cries out, “Forgive me my debts,” the sinner also present himself and be justified. For when the Gift comes forth from God, He gives it to him who is worthy and to him who is unworthy. His grace (or “favour”), when He pours it forth, is like to the sun and the rain, and He has mercy for sinners and for the righteous. And when the congregation asks mercy of God the sinners also who are therein are enriched from His Gift. When the whole congregation asks grace of God, He withholds it not even from the bad who are found therein. But the Evil One strives to steal away men at the time of the Mysteries, that he may cut them off from the Gift of God’s house; and he darkens the soul with restless and cowardly thoughts, and with worldly notions he chokes the mind. It may be he reminds thee of some business thou hadst forgotten, and chokes the soul with anxety concerning that matter, and with some weak thought stirs thee up to depart from the holy place about the unprofitable business. And that thought from Satan drags thee and pulls thee and brings thee forth and makes thee void of profit.

The Church in the world is like a scribe to men; and she teaches and makes them wise, and binds up the sores of all who come to her. And from her teaching the soul draws light, that she may overcome the darkness of death when it meets her. Come, enter, ye foolish, that were stained with lusts, and furbish your lives with the doctrine of the daughter of lights. Be not impatient to be gone from the supper which the bride of the whole world has made, that we should delight therein. Go not forth as soon as the consecration is (begun) in the sanctuary; for thou art a son of the household, not a stranger, that thou shouldst depart. When thou hearest: “Whoso has not received the sign, let him depart”; do not thou depart, who art signed, yea, and brought near. Be thou one of the household at the hour of these Mysteries; do not thou get up and go forth and become as one of the externs. Thou art signed with the sign, thou art stamped with the stamp, among the brethren thou art written: why shouldst thou go forth with the unsigned, as one that cometh short? “Him who is not baptised” the priest drives out when he is about to consecrate, not thee does he drive out, who art one baptized in the Divinity. Baptism, daughter of lights, is the King’s sign, and thou hast put on the great sign: why shouldst thou go forth? With the oil they have signed thee, with the cross of light thy face is signed: it is to “him that is not signed” as thou art signed that they say, “Let him go forth.” The sign of life has made thee a brother of the Only-begotten and a son of His Father; and thou art in the household: thou shouldst not go forth. Remain within the door, and cry, “Abba, our Father”; for thou, being a son, it is permitted to thee to cry, “Our Father.” “Whoso is not baptized” — for this reason do they drive him out when the consecration is (begun), that it is not permitted to him to call the Heavenly One “our Father.” And “whoso is not baptized,” his number is not set among the sons; and if he should call the Father “our Father” it is a lie. And for this cause they say, “Whoso has not received the sign, let him depart,” that a lie may not be uttered among them that are true. Forth they drive him if he is not born with the second birth, lest he should dare to cry, “Our Father,” with the many, and make use of a word that is full of lying in the pure congregation, which daily sings those things that are true. Wherefore, when they drive out that unbaptized one, do thou enter in, for it is easy for thee to cry, “Our Father.” Thou art born with the second, the spiritual birth: it is fitting for thee to cry, “Our Father”: stay and cry it.