First reading: Sirach 3:2-6,12-14
Psalm: Ps 128:1-5
Epistle: Colossians 3:12-21
Gospel: Luke 2:22-40

And over all these put on love,
that is, the bond of perfection.—¨

1. Love is difficult

I don’t know about you, but isn’t that one of the most difficult things to understand. Loving someone… Where does that come from and how do we define it?

There are a lot of definitions out there, and society tends to market the most shallow of the definitions. Is loving the romantic Prince Machiabelli commercial, with the beautiful woman, long blond hair flying in the wind as she rides a white horse across golden fields soon to encounter her prince? It’s funny, but a fragrance company now markets Prince Machiavelli perfume. It is the perfume that says the ends justify the means.

We regularly see love being portrayed as just that, an exchange, and as a rush of feelings and emotions. That sort of love is love at face value, love that fades, love that is little more then a passing moment, soon to fade, just like any momentary rush of pleasure.

Love is difficult to define, especially when the messages are conflicted and confusing. We’ve come to the point where we simply accept the words ‘I love you’ as proof positive. We’re afraid to challenge a presumptive statement of love. If we look a little closer we will find that the statement is built on a foundation of sand. The statement has no more gravity than the words themselves; words that fade into the wind.

2. Haven’t families changed

Certainly families must define love, but we aren’t so sure of our definitions anymore. What is a family? How do we define it today? Remember, back in school. We had extended family. A lot of us who grew up in ethnic neighborhoods, or in the country, knew that definition. It was grandma, grandpa, aunts, uncles, cousins, mom, dad, brothers and sisters. We also learned of the nuclear family. That seemed so neat and efficient: mom and dad with two point five children. That was the family of the suburbs.

Now we’re not so sure. If anyone steps up and says: ‘This is my family’ we accept those words as proof positive. If we look a little closer we will find that the statement is built on a foundation of sand. The statement has no more gravity than the words themselves; words that fade into the wind.

3. Annoying relatives, tough family members

Let’s make this a little more real. My father-in-law frequently recounts the old adage: You can pick your friends but you can’t pick your relatives. We can look at some of the people we are related to and wonder if they’re from the same gene pool. The aunt that re-gifts every holiday. How many times has that salt and pepper shaker moved through the family? There’s that odd cousin with the annoying habits, the eccentric uncle, and of course the occasional black sheep. Family members, the relatives that come to us like a bunch of grapes, all grown together, some sweet, some sour, some big, some small, can be annoying or tough, sweet or sour, but they are a presence in our lives. They are family, familia, rodzina. Because of the relationship, in blood, they are something more than just words.

4. Scripture emphasizes family.

The Old Testament sets the pattern for family. More so, it sets the pattern for behavior within the family. Sirach tells us:

God sets a father in honor over his children;
a mother’s authority he confirms over her sons.
Whoever honors his father atones for sins,
and preserves himself from them.
When he prays, he is heard;
he stores up riches who reveres his mother.

Honor, authority, and the benefits that we derive from our right relationship with family are part of God’s design. The word family is mentioned over 430 times in the Bible, and that doesn’t include references to variants of the word like families, familial, etc.

Recall the statement in Exodus 12:3-4

Tell all the congregation of Israel that on the tenth day of this month they shall take every man a lamb according to their fathers’ houses, a lamb for a household;
and if the household is too small for a lamb, then a man and his neighbor next to his house shall take according to the number of persons; according to what each can eat you shall make your count for the lamb.

Another word for household is family. Israel consisted of families and neighbors. They were bound together by relationships and tribal heritage. That wasn’t an accident of culture. That relationship, family and neighbors, the tribe, was God’s design. Israel was from the seed of one man, Abraham. God set a plan in motion, that salvation would come from the heart of a family.

5. Paul’s shows the key elements

St. Paul elaborates on the Old testament’s understanding of family. Under the new covenant family was redefined. Christians do not come from one tribe, from one genealogical line. Rather, we are joined as family in a new kind of love. It is the love of Christ, love defined as agapao. Paul tells us, we who are chosen, holy and beloved, that our love is to be distinctive and marked by the following traits: heartfelt compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness and patience, forbearance and forgiveness, peace, unity in the one body, thankfulness, gratitude, subordination, avoidance of bitterness, obedience.

Paul tells us that these signs are signs of Christian love, agapao, love being the bond of perfection.—¨

6. Christ brings it all together, sacrificial love.

As Mary and Joseph brought Jesus to the Temple they had a specific duty in mind. They were consecrating their Son to the Lord.

They took him up to Jerusalem
to present him to the Lord,
just as it is written in the law of the Lord,
Every male that opens the womb shall be consecrated to the Lord

Jesus teaches us that this new love, agapao, is dependent on just that. Like Christ we are consecrated to the Lord. In that consecration, through our Baptism and fulfilled in our Confirmation, we are to live a new kind of love. Jesus’ teaching is that we, as members of this new family, are the object of God’s perfect love, and are on mission to share that love.

Agapao is exactly this: The divine love of God toward His Son, human beings in general and believers. It is the outwardly focused love God gives to us, and in turn God expects us to have for all mankind. God’s love isn’t impulsive, or based on feelings, nor does it rest upon undefined statements like ‘I love you’ or ‘We are family.’ What it is exactly is the way we live out Christ’s total giving, his total self sacrifice, His offer, which is open to all.

7. Who is my family

In Luke 6:47-48 we hear Jesus say:

Every one who comes to me and hears my words and does them, I will show you what he is like:
he is like a man building a house, who dug deep, and laid the foundation upon rock

As Christians we have a foundation built on solid rock, more than just words, words that will fade into the wind.

God’s design is that we love as He loves. Loving means to live the definition of agapao. We are to love without limit or barrier, outwardly. Our love extends to all humanity, and brings a new level of meaning to the word family. It is more than the Old Testament definition of family, neighbor, and tribe, and it is far greater, because the Son of God changed that. By the salvation He brought He links each one of us, one-to-the-other, as family.

So who is my family? It is all of us, past, present, and future. God’s love is that inclusive and welcoming because it calls us to live outside of ourselves, at a level beyond mere feelings. Love for the family of God, mankind, demands no less than our Christ like sacrifice. Our family is without boundary, without classification, and is more than words. All are welcome to meet Christ, and to face, along with us, the challenge of living agapao, of giving up words, phrases, wants, and desires built on sand, and living as Christians should. As family. Amen.